In our situation, my husband is our lead youth pastor, and I am a volunteer who helps out, so I will be writing from that perspective. In many ways, I am a lot like our other volunteers, but as his wife, I see a lot more than some others do and I also have opportunities to help and support him that are unique. Here are some ways I do or try to honor him:
Give him grace when he can’t talk about what is going on at work.
When he gets home, I usually ask him how his day went. Sometimes that answer is a little short and that’s it. I’ve learned that most of the time when I get a short response, it is because it is something he doesn’t want to talk about, or can’t. He has people come and speak to him confidentially, so he can’t even tell me who he met with or why it has him down. I try not to push him and give him time to process.
Give him time alone to pursue his hobbies.
Everyone needs time to unwind and a youth pastor is no different. For my husband, this usually means he takes off hunting or fishing. Sometimes it is a night out with the guys.
Speak words of encouragement and affirmation.
Some people think that youth pastors just play video games and eat pizza. There is so much more that they do, so I try to remind him often how much of an impact he is making and how much I respect him for all his hard work.
Appreciate that he is both a man and a 13-year-old at heart.
He needs both adult conversation and time to play video games and glow frisbee and to do hot wing challenges.
He is the leader. Follow him.
But you are his wife. Tell him when he has something in his teeth. You may be the person that needs to approach him about something other people may be uncomfortable saying. You have that relationship.
Use the ways you compliment each other in marriage to help him with youth ministry.
For me, that sometimes looks like baking a snack for students, sometimes it looks like designing a logo to promote a student event. You work uniquely as team any other time. Carry that into ministry.
What unique ways have you found to support and honor your partner in ministry?
Thanks for sharing this! My situation is different because I am the youth pastor at our church and I am getting married in October. I appreciated this post because it allowed me to see things from both sides. It also gave me tangible ways to love my future husband. Thanks for helping a girl out! :)